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The main cause of family discord

The divorce rate in modern society is very high, there are also a lot of single parent families. It is often assumed that the main cause of divorce is often adultery or difficult circumstances. However, in reality, it is “linguistic violence” that is really the cause of hard-to-imagine injuries, the main cause of family discord.

In ‘Following Honor and Humiliation’ it is written: “Good people speak, the oocytes are white; merchants of language, deeply rooted conflicts ”, which means that words are friendly with others, as is the warmth and softness of silk; sharp, sarcastic words are like spearheads that hurt others.

The famous furniture maker IKEA once had a special experience at a school in the Middle East. The experiment went as follows: first, they selected two identical flowerpots, both fertilized and placed in a place with equal exposure. The only difference is that one pot of flowers received words of love from the students, the other pot received scolding and harsh words.

For example, affectionate words such as: “I love your look”, “I am so happy as soon as I see you”, “You are so beautiful”… and malicious words like: “You are such a jerk “go away, you’re everywhere”, “aren’t you a special plant”, “are you still alive”…

The experimental results surprised the students here, as the flowerpot that was insulted gradually withered, and the flowerpot that received praise grew very well. Same development environment, but a month later there was such a big contrast. From here, it can be seen that even plants cannot tolerate violent language, let alone humans.

Sometimes it only takes one sentence to beat someone. If malicious words are spoken from the mouth of a loved one, the damage will be doubled. If language loses its warmth, it is an invisible murder knife, it is also the most frightening point of linguistic violence.

Many of the social events that cause insecurity for people stem from the injuries criminals suffered as children.

The family is the same, so many families disagree, parents and children face each other because of linguistic violence. Living for a long time in such a situation, the feeling of belonging to this family or of responsibility towards this family also gradually fades. This leads to problems in the family, adultery, divorce… also increase.

When there is a conflict between husband and wife, we try not to say malicious words or hurt ourselves.

If all kinds of pressures build up over a long period of time, it is easy to have family tragedies, mild to divorce and serious to suicide.

We always give words of love to others, but always vent our anger on the loved ones next to us. There are no perfect people in this world, but everyone has flaws, it takes time to correct them. If we can adapt to our imperfections, then why can’t we be kind to the imperfections of others?

Some say the family is not a place to preach doctrine, but a place to speak words of love. Therefore, a harmonious family also needs the enthusiastic contribution of every family member, not just an individual.

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